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And now a few words from our sponsors…

Posted October 29, 2009 By Chvad SB

asiancowgirlAnd now a few words from our sponsors…

We at The Facility would like to thank you for buying our “things outside the skin” ™ brand “God in a Box” ™. We hope that this pre-packaged salvation will provide you with many years of enjoyment. Imagine… now you can do anything! In the past, you’d have to pay dearly for your mistakes or crimes against humanity… but now, simply put, you don’t have to or your money back!

IT’S EASY TO USE!!!

Salvation was never so easy! It’s simple. After some horrible, inexcusable, irreparable, unmistakably BAD thing that you’ve done, open your “things outside the skin”™ brand “God in a Box”™ and look for the specially designed “Crucified Baby with Nail in Crotch” image. This image has been specially made to invoke divine acts of God. After finding the image, rub your finger on its belly button and pronounce these magic words in a bold, deep voice, “Good Golly! Holy Moly! Hey, God, I’m white! How the Hell could this happen to me?!

“Does it only work if I’m white? Hey, that’s not fair!”

Heck no! Our “things outside the skin” brand “God in a Box” is not only a multi-racial product, but also multi-gender and multi-deity. Sing your magic words to any god you believe in! Just replace “God” with some other Holy guy, “Hell” with your horrible place of choice, and “white” with your current pigmentation. Read the remainder of this entry »

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